all my sons

Dear diary, today has been quite difficult. Actually no. The word difficult doesn’t even come close to describing how this day was.
It was horrible, I lost everything. I lost my girlfriend, I found out my father is responsible for the death of my brother, and I can’t do anything about it because I also lost my father.
I don’t even know what to do with my life anymore.
Looking back, I have no idea how I haven’t realised it sooner. That my dad is responsible for everything.
Maybe I should end myself as well. Become just another suicide victim of the Keller family.
That’s what I thought at first. My second idea was to run away with my mom to a different city. Start a new life, A fresh start. Try to forget about everything even tho I know I can’t.
Anyway, I don’t think writing here makes me feel any better.
I can’t really help it though… I need to vent a little bit and I don’t really feel like I have anyone to talk to.
My biggest wish is that I wouldn’t have to write in here ever again…
So to whoever’s reading this. If I haven’t killed myself. I hope you’re doing well.
Chris.