Some days, when life isn’t going exactly the way it should (or at least the way I think it should), I sit myself down and look for a way of doing something very useful.
Then, I had this idea, during a Scrabble game (with myself). I thought of how Lewis Carroll was the pre-inventor of Scrabble. I thought of Jabberwocky, a poem with nonsensical words, some of which eventually became bona fide members of the dictionary. I thought of all the words I ‘invent’ during a single game trying to make best use of my letters.
Lewis Carroll did it. I can do it.
I will make up new words. New words for the world!
Move over brillig, gyre and gymbol. Mel is here!!
A new invented word is sometimes called a neologism. One way is to combine two words into one that carries a mixed meaning. This is referred to as a ‘portmanteau’.
It turns out that inventing words is now more difficult than it was in the 19th century. So many people are writing so much. But it is easy to check whether you are the ‘first’.
And it is easy to be disappointed. When my children were little, I invented the nonsensical word “feduji” to describe those rubbery, inedible little bits of chewy chicken. The word is still in common use. In my family.
But when I looked up “feduji”, this is what I found:
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Yes, it is true (as I discovered scrolling down), feduji is a new word (mine) in the English language, but I am not the first to claim it as my own. Internetically speaking, that is.
So I set out to invent words that are new. So new, they don’t exist anywhere in the universe. In any context. In any blog. In any language. At least, not as far as those clever search bots are concerned.
Here is my crop thus far. They were not easy to find. Many of my hopefuls had already been ‘spoken for’.
Probably lots of other bored people are trying to come up with new words as we speak. Who knows, this might even turn into a sport of sorts.
I gave you clues as to what each of the new words means to me, but perhaps better to let your own imagination fleap and leave it as a mistaferous (also misspelled as mystaferous) vertiglio.
I hope you have fun with them. Trust me, it’s much more fun making up your own. Send yours to me and I promise to publish the best. I might even give you credit!
And now, all that remains is to type them here. After all,the search bots will be reading every single word of this book in a day or two. And I will be waiting to kvelp the moment I see my new words in G-search next week. Maybe even Bing! Then they will have a life of their own. So here they are:
Frelicast – think a bunch of hassidim doing a webinar on Purim
Fraspination – When you’re equally frastrated and aspined. Also the name of a new bored game.
Fictinimous – self-serving and made up
Parsimonetary – the economics of a frugal finance minister
Frambionous (this one is easy)
Balalorca (hint- think of Spanish poetry put to Russian music)
Jackpotpourri – A savory find
Specigate – When you’re just not spelling out your specifics
Hilasticy (sometimes appearing as hilasticity) – I’m flexible on this one. Perhaps Hillary explaining one of her miss demeanours.
Pessipuss – A bear in a bull stock market. Brother Dave was one.
Shulliness – Have to ask my wife
Underegg – to underestimate, opposite of overegg and sideways eggonedge.
Frenetarium (sometimes misspelled as frenetorium, frenitorium, frenitarium) – where frenetic people tend to end up.
Polititis – a disease which infects you with human kindness
sometimes called polite-is or even Polite-itis.
Durmitionary – While you were sleeping
Dictaberry – A fruit you can talk down to
Rabbooze (think Manischewitz)
Icicutory (think of a very cold place)
Dampinaria – A disease you get from being in wet places
Theoplaric – Religious nonsense
Pantigule – A riddle that has to do with underwear
Pellitross – A bird that never existed
Shastoric – You had to be there
Plegitonic – Not to be confused with pledgitonic
Strypatin – A new drug
Homilitary – Service of sorts
Pindacoil – With a curl at the top
Lickorable – Something very sweet
Almostchotomy – Not quite a dichotomy, as in two things that are almostchotomous, but not quite dichotomous.
Trycaughtame – A dichotomy, when there are three, not two
Mishinigeh (sometimes misspelled as mishinige) – a madman on a mission. Michiganeh if it’s someone headed in that direction.
Pathomelic – the disease of being me.
Petchabulous – something amazing, in seven minutes or less, perhaps to do with a dachshund.
Serendinternet – something serendipitous which I appear to have coined on Facebook in 2009.
Zodipack – astrology in a card game
Oxygism – ask Yossi Vardi
Fraspination – the name of the game
Narocissist (see also narocissism) – self-centered, without seeing the big picture .
Plastiflippancy – Flippant, but with options (sometimes spelled plastoflippancy)
Expidentials – Exponents that get you from here to there, sometimes quite serendipitous
Floptured – As in “floptured thinking”. Ideas that are ruptured/flipped/flopped/twisted
Itwea – Pronounced eye-twee-a. Twisted idea.
Hippochotomous – a divisible hippo, not to be confused with
Hippocaughtamoose, which is a different cattle of fish
slimyander – cousin of the Salem ‘ander’, distinct relative of sly meander, neither of these to be confused with salamanders or other slippery reptiles that actually exist.
Cyrcoyle – A learning process that comes round to its beginning. For example, Sir Alexander Fleming was a highly intelligent man. At the opposite end of the scale we have the wombicile who is an imbecile from the womb. Imbecile comes from the Greek word for stick. So does the word ‘bacillus’ which is a Gram positive bacteria. Gram positive bacteria are sensitive to penicillin which was discovered by Sir Alexander Fleming.
Grandpagarten (sometimes misspelled as grandpargarden) –
Grandpagarten is the day care center where my grandpa goes every day. It’s just like a kindergarten, except there is no playground or sand box, and you don’t have to go to grade one afterwards.
fixtacles – glasses that help over come chromatic shift
spectracles – much the same
pixtacles – like wise
scratchybax – they live on the dark side of the last planet in the universe.
Oh, and this really long word for my upcoming children’s book:
Neither Oxford Dictionary nor Merriam Webster define it as the “magical ability to detect singular territorial manifestations upon the wearing of glasses and the ingesting of passiflora”. But I do.
Your Google search – passiflorabellicaboolamanifesterritorimonospectacleness – did not match any documents.
- Make sure that all words are spelled correctly.
- Try different keywords.
- Try more general keywords.
So Mr. Carroll, it’s high time for some carrolicity.
Please make room. I’m on my pleuripathetic way.
More from the floor:
transclarency, vegitory, divergidity, divergity, vegitory, saluphory, ownus, coaless, swimen, editoiletries, interdectionary, invigital, magninimous, ribidulous, juxtemporaneous.